His shoulder relax as she says that. He's been so mixed up since it all happened, not knowing how to feel. It's nice to hear he's not doing it wrong somehow.
"Messy sounds right. I hope one day it won't all feel so confusing. I know that cutting him off is what everyone says to do but it's not easy. I didn't... I don't... hate him." No matter how many people say that he should.
"I know. And no one can ask you to. If Basira turned up, nothing Erin said would actually stop me from talking to her. Trying to work... something out." One of the many reasons she's a hypocrite for not telling him about Erik right off, but, well. Too late. At least they're talking about it. "I'd feel... weird, wouldn't be sure where I stood, but I'd do it. Erik's a different kind of complicated, confusing, but you'll get there."
She'd be more worried if he hadn't been able to set that initial boundary, but now he has... she thinks he can get there, work it out, for whatever measure that's possible.
"Yeah. That's it, exactly." It's awkward and uncomfortable, like two separate lives colliding head-on, but he still wants to work something out. He needs to do this. He needs to do it for himself. He took the first step and didn't fumble, and for that he wants to feel proud.
"I'm not going to let him be the boss of me ever again. I promise. But I don't want to shun him forever, either. If people can change, so can he. But if everyone keeps attacking him, he'll never want to."
"Yeah," Daisy breathes. She knows more than enough about how easy it is to keep justifying being a piece of shit if the world keeps feeding you convenient excuses. "Can't make promises for anyone else, but I won't poke the bear. Promise."
"Thank you," he says with complete sincerity. "I mean, obviously if he starts it I'm not going to blame you, but he's usually smarter than that. He doesn't like to fight." If he can talk himself out of it instead.
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hadnoright) wrote2022-11-01 01:56 am
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"Messy sounds right. I hope one day it won't all feel so confusing. I know that cutting him off is what everyone says to do but it's not easy. I didn't... I don't... hate him." No matter how many people say that he should.
no subject
"I know. And no one can ask you to. If Basira turned up, nothing Erin said would actually stop me from talking to her. Trying to work... something out." One of the many reasons she's a hypocrite for not telling him about Erik right off, but, well. Too late. At least they're talking about it. "I'd feel... weird, wouldn't be sure where I stood, but I'd do it. Erik's a different kind of complicated, confusing, but you'll get there."
She'd be more worried if he hadn't been able to set that initial boundary, but now he has... she thinks he can get there, work it out, for whatever measure that's possible.
no subject
"I'm not going to let him be the boss of me ever again. I promise. But I don't want to shun him forever, either. If people can change, so can he. But if everyone keeps attacking him, he'll never want to."
no subject
"Yeah," Daisy breathes. She knows more than enough about how easy it is to keep justifying being a piece of shit if the world keeps feeding you convenient excuses. "Can't make promises for anyone else, but I won't poke the bear. Promise."
Or maybe it should be poke the hawk...
good place to wrap?
"I really appreciate you understanding."
yes!
He's far too smart to let himself be provoked to starting it a second time, she's sure of that. She'll have to behave. Ugh.
"'Course." She reaches to give his arm a light pat. "Least I can do."